“In 2019, while going through a divorce from an abusive spouse, I was working at a company where I’d built a strong 11-year tenure. I shared a workspace with three newer coworkers — two of whom had previously staged interventions urging me to leave my husband. At the time, I considered them friends.
After my divorce was finalized and my ex moved out, I hired a humane pest control service to help with a long-standing rodent issue at my home. The company would notify me around 4:30 PM each Monday so I could meet them after work. As a salaried, exempt employee, I stayed late other days to make up the time. I also had seniority and had played a role in hiring all three coworkers.
Unbeknownst to me, one team member — new to the company and the field — tried to position herself as a future manager and began monitoring my comings and goings. I later learned she and the others quietly messaged each other on Teams, ostracizing me. Eventually, they invited me to lunch, where I was ambushed with accusations that I was making the team look bad and putting our department at risk. I was blindsided, humiliated, and furious — but stayed silent, not reporting it right away.
Eventually, they invited me to lunch, where I was ambushed with accusations that I was making the team look bad and putting our department at risk. I was blindsided, humiliated, and furious — but stayed silent, not reporting it right away.
When I did confide in my manager weeks later, he admitted he knew about their plan and supported it. One of the three was eventually promoted but left after a public meltdown. The newly hired assistant manager (later promoted) provided strong leadership, and under his guidance, I received the best performance review of my career and was recommended for promotion.
Then the coworker who initiated the lunch ambush was promoted to assistant manager. Once she became my direct supervisor, everything changed. She began yelling at me over minor or uncontrollable issues, and I received my first poor performance review in over a decade — just four months after my highest one.
After raising concerns with HR, my review score was quietly adjusted, and I received a small bonus. However, the psychological toll of reporting to someone who targeted me was immense. Recently, our department was reorganized, and we now report to a new interim manager — someone I trust — which gives me cautious hope.
This experience echoes an earlier chapter in my career, when I endured an abusive male manager who humiliated women and once told me to wear a blonde wig to work. He was eventually terminated, but the damage he caused lingered for years.
Ironically, this entire experience took place at a company repeatedly named one of the best places to work in the region. The dissonance between the public image and the internal culture has left me disillusioned — but not silent.”